Selepas beberapa kali merenung, mendiamkan diri, menyesuaikan diri dengan sebahagian 'hidup' baru, finally baru dapat kekuatan to announce to all my friends that the relationship between me and 'the-unlucky-guy' has ended a few months ago (You did not noticed any difference pun kan).
I have gone through a rough time dealing with emotion; heart breaking, frustration, pain, bleeding which I cannot find and cure the wound. Nangis guling-guling? Not shy at all to admit YES. I did. I went to work, meet my my colleagues, students with panda eyes (thanks to the inventor for concealer).
But to get frustrated menonggeng sampai abaikan kesihatan, family, my job... BIG NO. I have a lot more responsibilities. So I have decided to move on.
I have my family
I have my income/job/students
I have my assets
I have my car
I have some savings for wedding which I have spent ALL of it <-- shopping therapy. And believe me, it does really works.
This is an example of it is good for a woman to have their own income. So that when we get dump, we can still survive (I never think that I will be dumped like this). It was a flawless relationship but when Allah said no, it is BIG NO. We always pray for the best and ask Allah to show us the path... and He has decided this is our destiny. Alhamdulillah this incident was happening before marriage.
I am very lucky to have a group of people that are very supportive in every aspect. They are my family, friends, my job, and my new love; twin cats. I think I managed to overcome the bad feeling after several days.
Allah Maha Adil. He has sent 'the-unlucky-guy' for some reasons. He took him away from me at the right moment. He has replaced him with something better. It may not be a love from human, but he is replacing it with a loyal love from my cats, good career, good bosses, good job, good students and many more. Some people are very lucky to found jodoh awal, but for those who has not found yet, we are lucky in some different ways. Bila ada tu, adalah. Prioritize.. bukan desperate.
I let go some gifts that I have not used recently. A part of relief. Some of them I am still using it - expensive and usable. But one thing I wish, I wish the ring was made by gold so that I can sell it back. Haih.. so girls, I have a short but sweet advise for you.. if you have boyfriend, ask for 916 GOLD RING/accessories... the most cheapest 916 ring also can.
In conclusion, other than love to human, a person, a man... there are so many other things that are important in our life. If he does not love you anymore, FINE... many other people loves you. Don't forget your responsibility. Aim to be a better person.
Now forget about Lagu Ella - Sembilu yang mendayu-dayu nangis guling-guling.
We move on to Jacklyn Victor - Separuh Jiwaku.
So please after this do not ask about "Bila lagi nak langsung?", "Bila nak kahwin?" dan seangkatannya...